"MOTHER!"
"As I was saying"--
"Mother!"
"Miss Jones wore a white figured satin"--
"Oh! mother!"
"With short sleeves"--
"Mother! mother!"
"Looped up with a small rosebud"--
"I say! mother! mother!"
The child now caught hold of her mother's arm, and shook itviolently, in her effort to gain the attention she desired, whileher voice, which at first was low, had become loud and impatient.Mrs. Elder, no longer able to continue her account of the manner inwhich Miss Jones appeared at a recent ball, turned angrily towardlittle Mary, whose importunities had sadly annoyed her, and, seizingher by the arm, took her to the door and thrust her roughly from theroom, without any inquiry as to what she wanted. The child screamedfor a while at the door, and then went crying up-stairs.
"Do what you will," said Mrs. Elder, fretfully, "you cannot teachchildren manners. I've talked to Mary a hundred times aboutinterrupting me when I'm engaged in conversation with any one."
"It's line upon line and precept upon precept," remarked the (sic)visiter. "Children are children, and we mustn't expect too much fromthem."
"But I see other people's children sit down quietly and behavethemselves when there is company."
"All children are not alike," said the (sic) visiter. Some are morerestless and impetuous than others. We have to consult theirdispositions and pay regard thereto, or it will be impossible tomanage them rightly. I find a great difference among my ownchildren. Some are orderly, and others disorderly. Some have astrong sense of propriety, and others no sense of propriety at all."
"It's a great responsibility; is it not, Mrs. Peters?"
"Very great."
"It makes me really unhappy. I am sometimes tempted to wish them allin heaven; and then I would be sure they were well off and welltaken care of. Some people appear to get along with their childrenso easy. I don't know how it is. I can't."
Mrs. Peters could have given her friend a useful hint or two on thesubject of managing children, if she had felt that she dared to doso. But she knew Mrs. Elder to be exceedingly sensitive, andtherefore she thought it best not to say any thing that might offendher.
There was a quiet-looking old gentleman in the room where the twoladies sat conversing. He had a book in his hand, and seemed to bereading; though, in fact, he was observing all that was said anddone. He had not designed to do this, but the interruption of littleMary threw his mind off his book, and his thoughts entered a newelement. This person was a brother of Mrs. Elder, and had recentlybecome domesticated in her family. He was a bachelor.
After the (sic) visiter had retired, Mrs. Elder sat down to herwork-table in the same room where she had received her company, andresumed her sewing operations, which the call had suspended. She hadnot been thus engaged long, before Mary came back into the room,looking sad enough. Instead of going to her mother; she went up tothe old gentleman, and looking into his face with her yet tearfuleyes, said--
"Uncle William?"
"What, dear?" was returned in a kind voice.
"Something sticks my neck. Won't you see what it is?"
Uncle William laid down his book, and, turning down the neck ofMary's frock, found that the point of a pin was fretting her body.There was at least a dozen little scratches, and an inflamed spotthe size of a dollar.
"Poor child!" he said, tenderly, as he removed the pin. "There now!It feels better, doesn't it?"
"Yes, it feels better; thank you, dear uncle!" and Mary put up hersweet lips and kissed him. The old gentleman was doubly repaid forhis trouble. Mary ran lightly away, and he resumed his book.
In about ten minutes, the child opened the door and came in pullingthe dredging-box, to which she had tied a string, along the floor,and marking the progress she made by a track of white meal.
"You little torment!" exclaimed the mother, springing up, andjerking the string and box angrily from Mary's hand. "It is too bad!you know well enough that you had no business to touch this. Justsee what a condition the floor is in! Oh dear! Shall I never teachthe child any thing?"
Mrs. Elder took the dredging-box out into the kitchen, and gave thecook a sound scolding for permitting the child to have it. When shegot back, Mary had her work-basket on the floor, rummaging throughit for buttons and spools of cotton.
"Now just see that!" she exclaimed again. "There now!" And littleMary's ears buzzed for half an hour afterwards from the sound boxshe received.
After the child was thrust from the room, Mrs. Elder said,fretfully, "I'm out of all heart! I never saw such children. Theyseem ever bent on doing something wrong. Hark! what's that?"
There was the crash of something falling over head, followed by aloud scream.
Uncle William and Mrs. Elder both started from the room and ranup-stairs. Here they found Henry, a boy two years older than Mary,who was between three and four, lying on the carpet with a bureaudrawer upon him, which he had, while turning topsy-turvy aftersomething or other, accidentally pulled out upon him. He was morefrightened than hurt, by a great deal.
"Now just look at that!" ejaculated the outraged mother when thecause of alarm became apparent. "Just look at that, will you? Isn'tit beyond all endurance! Haven't I told you a hundred times not togo near my drawers, ha? No matter if you'd been half killed! There,march out of the room as quick as you can go." And she seized Henryby the arm with a strong grip, and fairly threw him, in her anger,from the chamber.
While she was yet storming, fretting, and fuming over the drawer,Uncle William retired from the apartment and, went down-stairsagain. On entering the room he had left but a few minutes before, hefound Mary at her mother's work-basket again, notwithstanding thebox she had received only a short time before for the same fault.
"Mary," said Uncle William to the child, in a calm, earnest, yetkind voice.
The child took its hands from the basket and came up to her uncle.
"Mary, didn't your mother tell you not to go to her basket?"
"Yes, sir," replied Mary, looking steadily into her uncle's face.
"Then why did you go?"
"I don't know."
"It was very wrong." Uncle William spoke seriously, and the child'sface assumed a serious expression.
"Will you do it any more?"
"No, sir." Mary shrink close to her uncle, and her reply was in awhisper.
"Be sure and not forget, Mary. Mother sews with her spools ofcotton, and uses her scissors to make little Mary frocks and aprons,and if Mary takes any thing out of her work-basket, she can't do hersewing good. Will you remember?"
"Yes, sir."
"Now don't forget."
"No, sir."
"And just see, Mary, how you have soiled the carpet with thedredging-box! Didn't you know the flour would come out and bescattered all over the floor?"
"No, sir."
"But now you know it."
"Yes, sir."
"You won't get the dredging-box any more?"
"No, sir."
While this conversation was going on, Mrs. Elder came down, stillfeeling much excited. After Uncle William had said what heconsidered enough to Mary, he took up his book and commencedreading. The child stood leaning against him for five or tenminutes, and then ran out of the room.
"How long do you suppose she will remember what you have said?"remarked Mrs. Elder, with a lightness of tone that showed hercontempt for all such measures of reform.
"Much longer than she will remember your box on the ear," was theblunt reply.
"I doubt it. Words make no impression on children."
"Harsh words make very little impression, I admit. For these closeup, instead of entering the avenues to the mind. Kind words, andreasons for things, go a great way even with children. How long didMary remember and profit by your sound rating and box on the ear(still red with the blow) into the bargain? Not over ten minutes;for when I came down-stairs, she had both hands into your basketagain."
"The little huzzy! It's well for her that I did not catch her atit!"
"It is well indeed, Sarah, for you would, by your angry and unjustpunishment, have done the little creature a serious injury. Did youever explain to her the use of your work-basket and the variousthings in it, and make her comprehend how necessary it was to you tohave every thing in order there, just as you placed it?"
"Gracious, William! Do you think I haven't something else to dobesides wasting time in explaining to children the use of everything in my work-basket? What good would it do, I wonder?"
"It would do a great deal of good, Sarah, you may rely upon it, andbe a great saving of time into the bargain; for if you made yourchildren properly comprehend the use of every thing around them, andhow their meddling with certain things was wrong, because it wouldincommode you, you would find them far less disposed than now to puttheir hands into wrong places. Try it."
"Nonsense! I wonder if I haven't been trying all my life to makethem understand that they were not to meddle with things that didn'tbelong to them! And what good has it done?"
"Very little, I must own; for I never saw children who had lessregard to what their mother says than yours have."
This touched Mrs. Elder a little. She didn't mind animadverting uponthe defects of her children, but was ready to stand up in theirdefence whenever any one else found fault with them.
"I reckon they are not the worst children in the world," shereplied, rather warmly.
"I should be sorry if they were. But they are not the best either,by a long way, although naturally as good children as are seenanywhere. It is your bad management that is spoiling them."
"My management!"
"Frankly, Sarah, I am compelled to affirm that it is. I have been inyour house, now, for three or four months, and must say that I amsurprised that your children are as good as they are. Don't beangry! Don't be fretted with me as you are with every thing in themthat doesn't please you. I am old enough to hear reason as well asto talk reason. Let us go back to a point on which I wished to fixyour attention, but from which we digressed. In trying to correctMary's habit of rummaging in your work-basket, you boxed her ears,and stormed at her in a most unmotherly way. Did it do any good? No;for in ten minutes she was at the same work again. For this I talkedto her kindly, and endeavoured to make her sensible that it waswrong to disturb your basket."
"And much good it will do!" Mrs. Elder did not feel very amiable.
"We shall see," said Uncle William, in his calm way. "Now I proposethat we both go out of this room, and let Mary come into it, and behere alone for half an hour. My word for it, she doesn't touch yourwork-basket."
"And my word for it, she goes to it the first thing."
"Notwithstanding you boxed her ears for the same fault so recently?"
"Yes, and notwithstanding you reasoned with her, and talked to herso softly but a few moments since."
"Very well. The experiment is worth making, not to see who is right,but to see if a gentler mode of government than the one you haveadopted will not be much better for your children. I am sure that itwill."
As proposed, the mother and Uncle William left the room, and Marywas allowed to go into it and remain there alone for half an hour.Long before this time had expired, Mrs. Elder's excited feelings hadcooled off, and been succeeded by a more sober and reflective stateof mind. At the end of the proposed period, Uncle William came down,and joining his sister, said--
"Now, Sarah, let us go and see what Mary has been doing; but beforewe enter the room, let me beg of you not to show angry displeasure,nor to speak a harsh or loud word to Mary, no matter what she mayhave been about; for it will do no good, but harm. You have tried itlong enough, and its ill effects call upon you to make a newexperiment."
Mrs. Elder, who was in a better state than she was half an hourbefore, readily agreed to this. They then went together into theroom. As they entered, Mary looked up at them from the floor whereshe was, sitting, her face bright with smiles at seeing them.
"You lit"--
Uncle William grasped quickly the hand of his sister to remind herthat she was not to speak harshly to Mary, no matter what she wasdoing, and was thus able to check the storm of angry reproof thatwas about to break upon the head of the child, who had been up tothe book-case and taken, therefrom two rows of books, with which shewas playing on the floor.
"What are you doing, dear?" asked Uncle William, kindly.
"Building a house," replied the child, the smiles that the suddenchange in the mother's countenance had driven from her face, comingback and lighting up her beautiful young brow. "See here what apretty house I have, uncle! And here is the fence, and these aretrees."
"So it is, a very pretty house," replied the uncle, while the mothercould scarcely repress her indignation at the outrage Mary hadcommitted upon the book-case.
The uncle glanced toward the table, upon which the, work-basketremained undisturbed. He then sat down, and said--"Come here, love."
Mary got up and ran quickly to him.
"You didn't touch mother's work-basket?" he said.
"No, sir," replied Mary.
"Why?"
Mary thought a moment, and then said--"You told me not to do it anymore."
"Why not?"
"Because if I take the cotton and scissors, mother can't make apronsand frocks for Mary."
"And if you go into her work-basket, you disturb every thing andmake her a great deal of trouble. You won't do it any more?"
"No, sir." And the child shook her head earnestly.
"Didn't you know that it was also wrong to take the books out of thebook-case? It not only hurts the books, but throws the room and thebook-case into disorder."
"I wanted to build a house," said Mary.
"But books are to read, not to build houses with."
"Won't you ask papa to buy me a box of blocks, like Hetty Green's,to build houses with?"
"I'll buy them for you myself the next time I go out," replied UncleWilliam.
"Oh, will you?" And Mary clapped her hands joyfully together.
"But you must never disturb the books in the book-case any more."
"No, sir," replied the child, earnestly.
Mrs. Elder felt rebuked. To hide what was too plainly exhibited inher countenance, she stooped to the floor and commenced taking upthe books and replacing them in the book-case.
"Now go up into my room, Mary, and wait there until I come. I wantto tell you something."
The child went singing up-stairs as happy as she could be.
"You see, Sarah, that kind words are more effective than harsh nameswith children. Mary didn't touch your work-basket."
"But she went to the book-case, which was just as bad. Children mustbe in some mischief."
"Not so bad, Sarah; for she had been made to comprehend why it waswrong to go to your basket, but not so of the book-case."
"I'm sure I've scolded her about taking down the books fifty times,and still, every chance she can get, she's at them again."
"You may have scolded her; but scolding a child and making itcomprehend its error are two things. Scolding darkens the mind byarousing evil passions, instead of enlightening it with clearperceptions of right and, wrong. No child is ever improved byscolding, but always injured."
"There are few children who are not injured, then. I should like tosee a mother get along with a parcel of children without scoldingthem."
"It is a sad truth, as you say, that there are but few children whoare not injured by scolding. No cause is so active for evil amongchildren as their mother's impatience, which shows itself from thefirst, and acts upon them through the whole period in which theirminds are taking impressions and hardening into permanent forms.Like you, Sarah, our own mother had but little patience among herchildren, and you can look back and remember, as well as I, manyinstances in which this impatience led her into hasty and ill-judgedacts and expressions that did us harm rather than good."
"It's an easy thing to talk, William. An easy thing to say--Havepatience."
"I know it is, Sarah; and a very hard thing to compel ourselves tohave patience. But, if a mother's love for her children be notstrong enough to induce her to govern herself for their sakes, whoshall seek their good? Who will make any sacrifice for them?"
"Are you not afraid to trust Mary up in your room?" said Mrs. Elder,recollecting at the moment that Mary was alone there for a longertime than she felt to be prudent.
"No. She will not trouble any thing."
"I'd be afraid to trust her. She's a thoughtless, impulsive child,and might do some damage."
"No danger. She understands perfectly what may be and what may notbe touched in my room, and so do all the children in the house. Iwouldn't be afraid to leave them all there for an hour."
"You'd be afraid afterwards, I guess, if you were to try theexperiment."
"I am willing to try it."
"You are welcome."
"Henry! William!" Uncle William went to the door and called thechildren.
Two boys came romping into the room.
"Boys," he said, "Mary is up in my room, and I want you to go up andstay with her until I come."
Away scampered the little fellows as merry as crickets.
"They'll make sad work in your room, brother; and if they do, youmustn't blame me for it."
"Oh, no, I shall not blame you, nor scold them, but endeavour toapply some corrective that will make them think, and determine neverto do so again. However, I am pretty well satisfied that nothingwill be disturbed."
In less than an hour, Mrs. Elder and her brother went up to see whatthe children were about. They found them seated on the floor, withtwo or three loose packs of plain cards about them, out of whichthey were forming various figures, by laying them together upon thefloor.
"Why, children! How could you take your uncle's cards?" said Mrs.Elder reprovingly.
"He lets us play with them, mother," replied the oldest boy, turningto his uncle with an appealing look.
"You haven't touched any thing else?" said Uncle William.
"No, sir, nothing else. We found Mary playing with the cards when wecame up, and we've been playing with them ever since. You don'tcare, do you, Uncle William?"
"No; for I've told you, you remember, that you might play with thecards whenever you wanted to."
"Can't we play with them longer, Uncle William?" asked Mary.
"Yes, my dear, you can play with them as long as you choose."
Mrs. Elder and her brother turned away and went down-stairs.
"I don't know how it is, William, that they behave themselves sowell in your room, and act like so many young Vandals in every otherpart of the house."
"It is plain enough, Sarah," replied her brother. "I never scoldthem, and never push them aside when they come to me, no matter whatI'm engaged in doing. I never think a little time taken from otheremployments thrown away when devoted to children; and, therefore, Igenerally hear what they have to say, let them come to me when theywill. Sometimes I am engaged in such a way that I must not beinterrupted, and then I lock my door. I have explained this to them,and now the children, when they find my door locked, immediately goaway. On admitting them into my room at first, I was very careful totell them that such and such things must on no account be touched,and explain the reason why; at the same time I gave them freepermission to play with other things that could sustain no seriousinjury. Only once or twice has any of them ventured to trespass onforbidden ground. But, instead of scolding, or even administering areprimand, I forbade the one who had done wrong coming to my roomfor a certain time. In no case have I had to repeat theinterdiction. If I can thus govern them in my room, I am sure youcan do it in the whole house, if you go the right way about it."
"You say that you always attend to them when they come to you?" saidMrs. Elder.
"Yes. I try to do so, no matter how much I am engaged."
"If I were to do that, I would be attending to them all the time. Icouldn't sit a moment with a visitor, nor say three words toanybody. You saw how it was this morning. The moment I sat down totalk with Mrs. Peters, Mary came and commenced interrupting me atevery word, until I was forced to put her from the room."
"Yes, I saw it," replied the brother in a voice that plainly enoughbetrayed his disapproval of his sister's conduct in that particularinstance.
"And you think I ought to have neglected my visitor to attend to anill-mannered child?"
"I think, when Mary came to you, as she did, that you should haveattended to her at once. If you had done so, you would have relievedher from pain, and saved yourself and visitor from a seriousannoyance."
"How do you mean?"
"Don't you know what Mary wanted?"
"No."
"Is it possible! I thought you learned it when she came to me afterMrs. Peters had left.
"No, I didn't know. What was the matter with her?"
The brother stepped to the door and called for Mary, who presentlycame running down-stairs.
"What do you want, uncle?" said she, as she came up to him andlifted her sparkling blue eyes to his face.
"What were you going to ask your mother to do for you when Mrs.Peters was here this morning?"
"A pin stuck me," replied the child, artlessly. "Don't you know thatyou took it out?"
"Yes, so I did. Let me look at the place," and he turned down Mary'sfrock so that her mother could see the scratched and inflamed spotupon her neck.
"Poor child!" said Mrs. Elder, the tears springing to her eyes asshe stooped down and kissed the wounded place.
"Are you playing with the cards yet, dear?" asked Uncle William.
"Yes, sir."
"Do you want to play more?"
"Yes, sir."
"Run along then." And Mary tripped lightly away.
"When the child first spoke to you, Sarah, if you had paused to seewhat she wanted, all would have been right in a few minutes. Even ifher request had been frivolous, by attending to it you would havesatisfied her, and been in a much better frame of mind to entertainyour friend."
Mrs. Elder was silent. There was conviction in Mary's inflamed necknot to be resisted; and the conviction went to her heart.
"We," said the old gentleman, "who have attained to the age ofreason, expect children, who do not reflect, to act with all thepropriety of men and women, and that too, without mild and correctinstruction as to their duties. Are we not most to blame? They mustregard our times, seasons, and conveniences, and we will attend totheir ever active wants, when our leisure will best permit us to doso. Is it any wonder, under such a system, that children aretroublesome? Would it not be a greater wonder were they otherwise?We must first learn self-government and self-denial before we canrightly govern children. After that, the task will be an easy one."
Mrs. Elder stayed to hear no more, but, rising abruptly, went upinto her chamber to think. When she appeared in her family, hercountenance was subdued, and when she spoke, her voice was lower andmore earnest. It was remarkable to see how readily her childrenminded when she spoke to them, and how affectionately they drewaround her. Uncle William was delighted. In a few days, however, oldhabits returned, and then her brother came to her aid, and by timelyuttered counsel gave her new strength. It was wonderful to see whatan improvement three months had made, and at the end of a year nomore loving and orderly household could be found. It took much ofMrs. Elder's time, and occupied almost constantly her thoughts; butthe result well paid for all.
Thinking that this every-day incident in the history of a friendwould appeal strongly to some mother who has not yet learned togovern herself, or properly regard the welfare of her children, wehave sketched it hastily, and send it forth in the hope that it maydo good.
THE END.
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